bobbysketch

I am awesome. In case any of you forgot. Yes, say it again and again. Then say it one more time.

I just thought everyone needed to know. In case anyone forgot.

That’s all I could do. I almost hit whatever was closest to me, but I don’t think my 15-year old cousin’s dad would have appreciated that. Fucking Arkansas. Fucking Les Miles. Fucking Darren McFadden. One thing is for sure, McFadden sewed up the Heisman. Another sure thing? Les Miles is gone. He quit last week. And he just cost his team the national championship. Fucking Arkansas. Fucking Les Miles. Fucking Darren McFadden. And Fucking Michigan. Ruined my Goddamned night. Sigh…..

Ok, being the curious scientist that I am, I decided to perform an experiment. I went past my local Best Buy and wanted to see how people lined up in 35-degree at midnight would react to antagonism directed towards them. Turns out – not well. All I did was call some people losers and give some the finger – it was a similar reaction in general – mostly profanities directed at me, and some toward my mother, and she wasn’t even there. But the one thing that really chapped my ass – some bitch had a baby out there in a stroller. Just chillin out in the freezing cold. I wanted to push her buttons and said, “Bitch go home and take care of your baby!” Her 300 pound husband didn’t appreciate that. It was at that point I realized that my experiment had to end, before my life did.

72 fucking hours, and 40 stores later, and I still can’t get a Wii. Wtf, man. Look, I ain’t one of those losers who goes and camps out in front of Circuit City at 6am, waiting for a 10am opening, so I can be that 400 pound cow who runs over people on her way in because she has to get the first 70 burgers of the daysystem. Fuck, I hate fat people.